The quiet gets masked in fatigue so nobody will ask. Dull pain deep enough to sleep until the distractions can overtake the memories and the questions and swallow them into routine. Helplessness can make a gentle man angry, so the gentle man sleeps.
And I wonder.
God is not bound by time. He forgives from the outside of our beginning and beyond our end. Time heals human wounds unless you pay homage to the sins that caused your hurt. You mark the yearly landmarks like a sin historian whose only sense of worth is through the failures of others. Vowing to never forget only serves to justify your long standing vengeance.
What if you don’t know how to change the course?
The sins of some people are conspicuous, going before them to judgment… – 1 Timothy 5:24 ESV
His sin was obvious. It walked itself into the light. While he stood exposed, his sins marched ahead of him and laid down at the cross. Like venom to venom, a scour to a wound, pain was the antidote. God knew the way to his heart. Gutted by his own sin, this man gladly gave away his rights to your failure so that he could be free from his own.
Are you are afraid of losing something?
…but the sins of others appear later. – 1 Timothy 5:24 ESV
Like a child hiding from his father, you poke sticks at the carcass just to see how the dead moves. You bear witness to his sin, turning the poured out Gospel into a lie. They are so deep that digging out would rearrange the life you built on top of them.
What is a life built on lies? Switch the names. Tell the story that makes you a redeemer. They don’t ask and you don’t tell.
Do you feel like it’s too late?
So also good works are conspicuous, and even those that are not cannot remain hidden. – 1 Timothy 3:25 ESV
Does it make you limp?
Isn’t it tiring to hide all the time?
What do you do with the fear?
You keep telling yourself that the monster chasing you is him. But, he’s not chasing you.
Don’t be afraid.
Nothing is covered up that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known. – Luke 12:3 ESV
The truth-bomb is still ticking, but you’ve become accustomed to the sound.
One day, every tongue will confess that He is God. Your justifications are a wagging tongue of self. You hide behind his mistakes and justify yourself by blaming him. His sin was blotted from the books when the blood spilled. Are you the book keeper?
Put down your towel. This blood won’t wipe off.
Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out. – Proverbs 10:9 ESV
Does your word mean nothing? You’ve built a house of cards, but he steadies his breath because she lives in that house. I already told you. He’s not your monster.
So, Who is chasing you?
He’s your Shepherd.
Therefore whatever you have said in the dark shall be heard in the light, and what you have whispered in private rooms shall be proclaimed on the housetops. – Luke 12:4 ESV
His quiet gets masked in fatigue so he can sleep it away. He lays under undisturbed blankets while the King breathes peace over him. He waits for the housetop proclamations and the mountains bow to the One who watches him sleep.
Love her extra for him today, will You? It’s her birthday.