my own humanity

Posted: January 21st, 2009 | Filed under: book, God, life | Tags: | No Comments »

In the six weeks that it’s been available, ‘Grace Is For Sinners‘ has sold 88 copies. I don’t know how other authors or publishers rate that, but to me it’s exciting. The momentum has been maintained by word of mouth and I can no longer trace from where people are hearing about the book.

In the past three weeks, I have received several requests to write a study guide for ‘Grace Is For Sinners.’ They want to do a Bible study based on the book and need my help to format it.

With all the buzz, excitement and opportunities to help people, I have become very aware of my humanity and weakness. Even though I’ve learned that there will never be a point where I don’t make poor choices and act selfishly, I still expect it and get disappointed in myself when I fail to measure up.

So, I rise back to my feet and dust the grit from my knees. I think I tore a hole in my cute new jeans, but I guess that makes me real. In the irony of time, while I’m standing here trying to dust off and re-tie my shoes, my pastor asked me to lead a Bible study at my church based on the teachings of ‘Grace Is For Sinners.’

Do I tell him I am a sinner? He already knows. I guess, in spite of what I have learned in the big picture, I may have forgotten that fact. The threads of deeply old-fashioned religion are apparent in my thought process because I still beat myself up when I fall. I’m like the people I despise. The Pharisaical religiosity makes my stomach turn and this time it’s coming from deep within myself.

I recently completed a collage painting and used two scriptures from two opposing perspectives as the focal point.

“If [Jesus] were a prophet, he would know who was touching him and what kind of a woman she is-that she is a sinner.”  Luke 7:39 NIV

“When it’s sin versus grace, grace wins hands down.” Romans 5:20 MSG

Today begins the next step in the world of “Grace Is For Sinners.” I have a coffee meeting to brainstorm the Bible study and a new book to write.

There’s nothing like a healthy dose of my own humanity to keep my message clear.


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