ruining everything

Posted: April 26th, 2012 | Filed under: God, life | Tags: | 9 Comments »

โ€Ž”Sanctification requires our coming to a place of death, but many of us spend so much time there that we become morbid.” Oswald Chambersย 

When you find yourself helpless to your sinful nature, when you mess up so bad that you want to crawl out of your skin and get away from yourself, when you are screaming for a Savior you thought you understood, but now feel completely unworthy of and alienated from…that is the kind of death that it takes to be free.

It’s not a matter of trying, it’s a matter of helpless fact. When you are begging to be squashed or saved, you are officially “out of the way.” The beauty in the horror.

Those who “add God to their existing ‘good'” don’t have a clue. Those who lose every claim to their own ‘goodness’ are swallowed up by God and have to suffer under the weight of believing in the Unseen Everything and trusting in the Unbridled Anything. All sensibility is contradicted and held together by the Invisible Wonderful that is crashing in on the self-sustained here-and-now.

The spiritual is more real than the so-called reality and the flesh and blood is about to rupture from trying to contain the Uncontainable. It’s terrifying elation. It’s life-threatening Life. It’s the Light that dwarfs the light. It’s the paradox that dumbfounds and ruins everything. It’s the one who says to his lover, “You have ruined me for any other attempt at love.”

God does that. He ruins you for any other attempt at life. He’ll let you resist until you have nothing left. When it’s done, it’s done. He’ll drain you of you and the whole kick about this thing is, you’ll thank Him for it. A person can deny Him until their eyes bleed, but when it’s time, it’s time. There really is no other place to run. Is there?

“First things first. Your business is life, not death. Follow me. Pursue life.” -Jesus in Matthew 8:22



9 Comments on “ruining everything”

  1. 1 Kristina said at 8:41 am on April 26th, 2012:


    Seriously every time I read one of your posts I get chills because it puts words to some aspect of my life. It's the moment of saying, "Either You are or You aren't and if You aren't then I can't."

    Immediately, my brain runs to three very specific moments in my life where it was either God you have to promise that you use this and that you can help this and bring me through this (which He's already said, but of course, not really thinking at that time…more like shell-shocked) or I can't handle it.

    Thanks again for your words….keep sharing them.

  2. 2 serenawoods said at 9:12 am on April 26th, 2012:

    Thanks, Kristina. ๐Ÿ™‚
    I love this: "Either You are or You aren't and if You aren't then I can't."

  3. 3 dawn said at 9:22 am on April 26th, 2012:

    I sure hope you are right about this.

  4. 4 serenawoods said at 11:56 pm on April 26th, 2012:

    I would bet my life on it.

  5. 5 Jason Wert said at 9:23 am on April 26th, 2012:

    Absolutely nowhere to run. The wreck of my life shows that. He just kept allowing everything to fall apart until I stopped fighting.
    My recent post Brought out of Egypt to death

  6. 6 serenawoods said at 11:58 pm on April 26th, 2012:

    I think until people start to question just how ruthless God seems to be, they don't really know Him.

  7. 7 Stephen_T said at 8:02 pm on April 26th, 2012:

    "It’s not a matter of trying, it’s a matter of helpless fact."

    "God does that. He ruins you for any other attempt at life."

    Less than twenty-five words, and yet if they took the form of rivers that flowed gently into a persons life, oceans would be filled before what they had to offer was exhausted.

    In the future, if you need some ideas to "camp out" on, I vote for these two as a couple of great candidates.

    My recent post The God who is with us and for us

  8. 8 serenawoods said at 11:57 pm on April 26th, 2012:

    I'll put it in my pocket. Thanks. ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. 9 Charise Christianson said at 10:10 am on April 30th, 2012:

    Serena, you minister to me so much. I really needed this post. I get so caught up in trying to be perfect, that I am literally living in a rollercoaster existence. I don't give myself grace because I feel that I am validating or taking a laid back approach to my sin and I have a hard time believing that God would have it for someone who messes up as much as me. But I am determined to know that grace and I am going to keep pushing in to grab ahold of it, even when I know that I don't deserve it.

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