For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” -Romans 8:15
You’re a butterfly in the rain. The furious flutter to be is reduced to trying to survive the journey through the rain to get home. All the while the depth is tugging on you. “Come home.”
You’re here in the struggle, trying to make three stretch to five and to make Not Yet expand to content. “I’m trying.”
Fear is the dictator of your peace.
You want to get it right, but you don’t know how. ‘Don’t do that and don’t do this.’ A whole life of not doing what you’re not supposed to do. A slave.
You’re not an indentured servant, slaving to earn your freedom.
Jesus came to free you from weight on your wings.
…and deliver all those who through fear of death were subject to lifelong slavery. -Hebrews 2:15
The weight is the law and you can’t earn your way. Trying is proof that you have not learned your lesson.
There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. -1 John 4:18
Perfected in love is a process brought on by your own failure. Don’t you see it? Failure has been repurposed. Don’t you know what it feels like to be rescued? Jesus tends to the fire starter while He lets the house burn to the ground.
‘Perfected in love’, means that you have nothing to fear. No punishment is awaiting your pathetic attempts. The bill collector isn’t calling to harass you, He’s calling to let you know that the debt has been satisfied. Stop avoiding Him. Stop living to ‘not sin’ and start living in freedom.
Freedom from fear. Perfected in love.
You think you can only answer when you have the payment. But, in that world, the debt accumulates interest and you’re getting further and further away from being able to answer. Don’t you know? You’ve been set free from that world.
Righteousness does not come from sweat. Righteousness comes from faith in Jesus.
Stop running. Nobody is chasing you.