Why is it that the Christian world needs to copy the Non’s and make their own version of things? The copycats are cheap, poorly put together and embarrassing. If you critique the market at all, they think they’re doing something right and they up the cheese factor.
There’s a company who sells complete ‘cool Christian’ outfits. From the shoes, the wrist sweatband, the dog-tags to the baseball cap, you can look like a Christian knock-off of K-Fed. T-shirts are advertised as ‘bold’ with graphics mimicking everyone in the department store from Affliction to Ed Hardy. By ‘bold’, I’m not sure if they mean their ‘extreme’ graphics or the words sprawled across the front on the shirts. There is one that can be seen at least four stores down in a mall hallway that reads, ‘I killed Jesus.’ I’m sure you can get a thumbs up from the other guy wearing the t-shirt that looks like it has smeared blood spelling out ‘Washed by his blood.’
I’m not trying to be a butt for the sake of being a butt. I just don’t know who these products are for, because they’re not for the Non’s. The Non’s think they’re socially inept. It’s just another way for you to divide yourselves off into a secluded section of existence.
Who gains the most by maneuvering Christians out of society by making them look like ridiculous posers and giving them alternate ways to interact with each other without entering the rest of the world? Who gets to lick the icing off the cake when those people slap high fives and use Christianese to communicate their gratitude for successfully removing themselves from the ‘fellowship’ of ‘the world’ and are just enjoying the ‘blessings’ of one another? I heard the term ‘Christian Ghetto’ recently. Perfect.
What the unbelieving world finds off-putting is the severe level of detachment from reality that they see inthose who wander out of the Christian Warehouses. Any market knows that if you put the ‘JC’ brand on a pack of breath mints, they’ll sell like hot cakes on the Trinket Jesus store front. Anyone who refuses to turn the Gospel into an outdated graphic slapped on the cheapest surface available will be bombarded by hoards trying to prove their Kingdom worth with their vinyl suits and microphone breath. Christians have earned the appearance of sweaty pre-pubescents wearing cheap and awkwardly bedazzled Cliche Costumes thinking nobody notices. Then they think it’s their ‘Jesus glow’ that makes people ask them why they stand out.
I need to go iron my ‘Abreadcrumb & Fish’ t-shirt and play with my bobble-head Jesus and BibleMan action figure while I search for the Christian alternative to Ray LaMontagne and figure out how to market my handcrafted ‘The Shack’ air fresheners.